Saturday 14 May 2011

The Journey goes on.........

Well here is a cheeky update as i haven't been online much lately. Still exercising religiously and at the same time i'm getting stronger i'm also getting weaker, and i've noticed other parts wearing not too well. Such as my Left Knee, hurts with bending, any light impact and biking too. So i'll be interested in what O'Hara has too say about that, and what he can say about the Right Hip too. Still hurts like hell doing steps, hills,stairs, walking on that side with no let up or improvement. Whereas the Left Hip hurts after a prolonged time of doing such activities but quickly recovers and it's a different sort of pain/ache all together. It actually feels like a healing ache. Although i have no idea how you girls work all day on them, even now i'm done in after some physio and light housework and have to rest the entire leg with plenty of tram and co-codamol with me. Never managed to ditch the painkillers once! The pain on the Left Side is always at the top of the thigh so i do question whether it's where i had the DVT or where the extra 2 inches came from with the Femur OST? I still can't lie down on my sides fully as the scars are still swollen areas, like extra thighs, Not flab as you might suspect but quite hard and feels like scar tissue.
I can honestly say i thought i would of been further on by now, But thats not being negative or anything just a real honest answer. I was hoping to be back at work, as i'm a freelance nail tech by trade and i have already considered this is not the trade i can do anymore due to wanting to protect the hips as much as possible. So i have considered the Tanning salons as i did Fake tanning at salons before, and i've considered perhaps going into beauty counters etc... Is it the mental aspect that holds me back? A new thought as i have just recently got back onto a bike, a real outdoor bike, not just my stationary bike at home where i'm totally safe. Now i love mountain biking and the thrill of the speed and uneven terrain, But just getting onto a bike was a HUGE mental block for me, after 2 years of not being on one, i found it immensely hard to lift my operated leg off the floor and trust in myself not too fall. It was like learning to ride all over again, shaky, scared to death, the fear is so strong i wouldn't of believed it if i hadn't felt it for myself. Now i wonder how much i have such a mental block with the leg, i chose my surgery, i looked forward too it loads, planned and prepared for it and in no way it i ever imagined this surgery would affect me mentally like it has done. So that is a consideration for newbie's that are planning surgery, just to warn you that it can happen, and how to get over it and not be afraid of feeling emotional over your surgery. I found baby steps help and confronting the issue head on, with logic and common sense helped me. But most importantly TALK to people and share your feelings.

So i'm off on Holiday in a months time, and i'm really really looking forward too it. I will be resting and recovering in the sun what could be better. And i hope that i have a new action plan for the Right Hip by then and this holiday will be needed before the whole surgery recovery cycle begins again.

I'm hopeless at asking questions when i see O'Hara, Are there any questions you would ask him if you were me? And how would you phrase them as i'm hopeless at that as well lol? Any help gratefully received guys and thank you for always being there for me xx

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